The person that comes to mind when I think of a competent
communicator is my Aunt Wanda. When she
communicates she always gives eye contact and talks in an even tone. Even when
she is upset you can never tell because her voice tone stays the same. She doesn't holler to get her point across
and she listens to what others have to say before she begins speaking. I am just the opposite, when I don't agree it
shows in my body posture and facial expressions. My voice tends to elevate when I get
excited/upset and I do a lot of talking with my hands. I do everything I can to get my point across
which isn't always a good thing. It's
hard for me not to do these things because I have been doing them for so long,
however I am working on it.
Because of this I believe that I am not always being
effective when communicating with others and this is why I have paid close
attention to my Aunt because she can speak and make a point without all of the
"extra" and that is what I attempt to do.
I am a work in progress and as I've gotten older and wiser I
tend to do better and this is one of my personal goals that I want to
accomplish because I do feel that sometimes my demeanor can be intimidating to
individuals who may not know me and that is never my intention.
Latarsha,
ReplyDeleteGood points and very honest! You certainly don't seem that way on paper. What you said about yourself reminds me of my youngest daughter. Particularly, you said, "I do everything I can to get my point across which isn't always a good thing." My youngest doesn't know how to give up. Her voice also gets loud, and all her emotion is in her voice. On the good side, her teachers think she is a leader. Maybe you also have leadership qualities. The emotions might spring from how much you care!
Liz Thomas
Honestly Liz I am trying to do better. Sounds like your daughter and I communicate a lot alike and I don't mean any harm and I'm sure she doesn't either,
ReplyDeleteLatarsha,
ReplyDeleteYou brought up an interesting thought about tone. When addressing my blog assignment this week I addressed my mother. I stated how she was calm, but along with being calm her tone was also soothing. Did you ever see your aunts tone change?
What techniques do you think she used to stay calm?
Hi Jacqueline, No I've never seen her tone change. I think that the way she speaks it's just in her. I've never seen anything different, no matter her stress level. I don't know if it's a technique that she uses or if it is just her humbleness that she portrays on a daily basis.
ReplyDeleteYour Aunt sounds like a wonderful person. I agree that tone can make or break a conversation. Tone can imply numerous things and can be taken out of context. One may sound excited, sarcastic, or even uninterested just by tone. This is something I am sure we will be discussing further in this course.
ReplyDeleteLatarsha,
ReplyDeleteYou sound like me. I always tell people I am a work in progress and God is not through with me yet. I allow my feelings to show in my gestures and you can tell in my tone of voice if I am happy, sad, or upset. I have a lot to work on and I have to learn to remain neutral. I have to learn to keep calm and not raise my voice because my daughter is not use to me raising my voice and it upsets her. I have to find effective communication skills to get my point across without yelling. Good luck!
Erica
Latarsha,
ReplyDeleteI have the same problem. I get very passionate at times and my voice raises. I have learned to combat this (sometimes) by first active listen then speak. Sometimes we are so worried about getting out point across that we ignore what the other person is saying and we are thinking about what we are going to say next.. This does not solve anything it just adds fuel. Try to just listen first and repeat back what that person is saying, often times it stifles the fire a bit.